Work feels meh? Here’s why your whole life might be paying the price
Ever snapped at your partner over dinner because of something that happened at work? Shouted at the kids about something minor? Or bored your friends senseless with a monologue about work?
When you feel stuck, frustrated and bored in your job, it pollutes your home life.
The internal promotion went to someone else. You went for a couple of interviews elsewhere but didn't get the job.
That’s when the doubt set in: ‘Maybe I’ve reached my natural level? I’m not cut out for leadership.’
And the self-justification started: ‘This job is OK – it's flexible and fits around my family’.
But deep down, you know you want more from your career. More growth. More fulfilment. More satisfaction. The internal battle rages on: ‘Should I try for the next level or stick with what I’ve got?’
You can do your job standing on your head but there’s no growth. You long for a stretch but no one seems to notice you’re capable of more. And you’re not sure how to show them because self-promotion turns you right off.
Meanwhile, you can’t just log off at 5pm. You endlessly replay what happened at work, those annoyances and frustrations:
It’s there in your head when you’re having dinner or watching a film with your family.
You’re grumpy at home, irritable with the kids or your partner.
A relaxing time with friends turns into a moanfest about the woes of work.
Your ability to be a good partner, parent and friend is reduced. Joy is sucked out of life.
And the longer it goes on, the more your self-belief is eroded. You’re trapped in a cycle of frustration, boredom and diminishing confidence that keeps you stuck.
That was me too. Watching the show-offs get promoted, wondering why my hard work wasn’t speaking for itself. Taking out my frustrations on a long-suffering partner who listened to my grievances night after night.
Happy at work, happy at home, happy in life
Whether you stay in your current role or find a new one, being happier at work will transform the way you experience life.
When your job brings fulfilment, satisfaction and enjoyment, you’ll:
Switch off from work and be more present with your partner (and the dog!)
Have more patience and calm to deal with stuff outside work, like sick children or a friend in crisis
Have more mental space for the things you’re interested in, like reading that novel you’ve had in a pile for months or joining that astronomy class you’ve had your eye on.
Gill’s story
Gill came to me feeling terribly guilty about losing her temper with the children most evenings. She was also struggling to connect with her husband and regularly cancelled plans with friends because work took up too much emotional energy.
In our work together, she identified the adjustments she needed to make to her working life to show up fully for her family. Like owning her strengths so she could have confidence in her way of leading. And honouring her need for time to decompress away from the stimulation of back-to-back meetings.
Afterwards, Gill felt herself to be a better parent. Before, she was losing her rag. Now, when she spends time with her daughters after work it is positive, quality time. She’s no longer losing her temper and instead responds playfully to them.
Her relationship with her husband improved, and she’s easier company for extended family too - no more work-induced crabbiness.
Gill’s sharper at work, kinder as a mum, and more connected as a wife, friend, and everything else because she took time to figure out what she needed to enjoy work again.
How long will you continue to let frustration at work pollute the rest of your life?
Are you content to stay stuck, slowly losing confidence and staring down the barrel of 30 years of boredom?
Or are you ready to tackle the stuff that’s holding you back from creating a fulfilling leadership career and a life you enjoy?
Let’s make work feel better – and life feel lighter
If you're ready to stop letting work drain the life out of life, let’s talk.
Book a free 15-minute Clarity Call. No pressure - just a friendly chat about what’s going on, where you want to get to, and whether coaching could help.